


The Heart Wants What it Wants

by BlueEyedMrsBaelish



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Alternate Canon, Based on a mod, Crack Relationships, F/M, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Forbidden Love, Imagine your OTP, Mages and Templars, OTP Feels, Post-Dragon Age: Inquisition, Pre-Dragon Age: Inquisition
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 12:53:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9608402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueEyedMrsBaelish/pseuds/BlueEyedMrsBaelish
Summary: The story of the forbidden love affair of the Templar, Cullen Rutherford, and Circle Mage/Grey Warden Lydia Amell.  Based on a creator's mod for Dragon Age: Origins, continued through the continuity of the DA games (specifically Origins and Inquisition).





	1. It Started Off With a Kiss

**Author's Note:**

> This is a crackship I've loved since the first time I played DA:Origins, and the idea hit me after seeing the mod of Cullen and Amell kissing. I'm planning on writing more chapters, but for now I hope you enjoy what I have so far! :)

Lydia Amell's eyes flicker back and forth over the flames of the candles, chewing her bottom lip nervously. It had only been mere moments since they’d spoken last, and while she knew he was checking to make sure they were alone, those seconds feel like an eternity.

Ever since the young mage had come to the Circle, she’d found herself taken with a young Templar. He was sweet and shy, and stuttered nervously every time she’d speak to him. He had been present at her Harrowing, and was the only Templar to look pleased when she came out unscathed. It hadn’t taken long for the feelings between them to become mutual, and while they knew it would never work between them - her a Circle Mage, he a Templar charged with watching her - they couldn’t resist one moment alone.

Lydia is soon taken away from her thoughts when she hears the door close, turning to see the man approach her slowly, his face filled with emotion.

Cullen Rutherford.

Her cheeks redden slightly as she turns to face him, her heart slamming against her ribcage as she studies him. His blonde curls are slightly disheveled, strong jaw covered in a light layer of scruff while his brown eyes gaze at her with an intensity she’s never seen before. It takes everything in her power to stay where she is, allowing him to come to the place where she stands.

It’s only a moment before Cullen in standing in front of her, gazing at her in a way that causes her to lose all sense of self. She turns and cups his face with her hand, the other wrapping around his shoulders as they meet for a heated kiss. The moment his lips touch hers, Lydia allows herself to give in, pressing her body against the cold metal of his uniform. His tongue pushes past her lips and she eagerly gives her all to him, his arms keeping her held against him tightly while her fingers slide into his hair. Every hurt she’s felt, every nightmare she’s ever had - it all disappears into the kiss, leaving only a Mage and Templar intertwined in each other, desperate for more.

The kiss ends all too soon, leaving both Cullen and Lydia gazing at each other with flushed cheeks and parted lips. They never break eye contact, arms still wrapped around the other for a few long moments. It’s Cullen who breaks away, clearing his throat and giving her one last longing look before turning and heading outside. Lydia watches him leave, a single tear spilling forth as the realization dawns on her that she can never be his.


	2. Somewhere Only We Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While traveling in the Brecilian Forest with her team, Lydia receives an unexpected visitor. She ends up having one of the most beautiful - and heartbreaking - days of her life.

“Lydia? There’s someone here to see you. A Templar…”

Lydia glances up from her Mabari to look at Alistair, brow furrowing in confusion. They were by the outskirts of the Brecilian Forest… Who would possibly find her there? “A Templar? Did you get his name?”

Alistair nods, returning her confused look. “Cullen, I believe. He looked a bit confused and worn out, but he asked for you by name. Said it was important.”

The mage blushes, petting her wardog on the head before standing up, brushing her clothing off. “Thank you. Can you see if he’ll meet me by the lake in the forest? It’s away from the werewolves and we should be safe.”

Lydia watches as Alistair leaves their camp, her heart racing as she makes her way into the forest. Near the entrance there’s a waterfall and a small lake; it was beautiful and easy to find, and best of all, private.

She didn’t have to wait long for Cullen to come past the trees, bewilderment clear on his face. Being a Templar, he wasn’t used to forests and woods, and found it all rather confusing. He wasn’t wearing his Templar gear, instead wearing simple travel clothes. Lydia stands and approaches him, cheeks red.

“Cullen… It’s been--”

Before she can finish he has her in his arms, kissing her like he did the night in her room. The surprise wears off quickly and within seconds she’s returning his passionate embrace, breathlessly kissing his lips over and over as he keeps her pressed tightly against him. Everything in her is begging her mind to let this happen, knowing how wrong this is but being unable to stop herself. If this is the last time she sees Cullen, she wants to remember him like this. 

When the kiss finally breaks Cullen speaks, his voice laboured as he keeps her close. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help… I needed to see you. I need you. You’ve taken over my thoughts, and I needed to be with you. Just this once…”

Lydia can’t help but smile at his words, her hands moving to cup his face. She had taken a liking to Alistair in her time away from the Circle, but nothing was set in stone. And Cullen, although he would never be able to be with her, was the first man she ever felt for. One night of passion with him would be enough to close this chapter in their lives, to help them both move on.

“Then take me, Cullen. Under the trees of the Brecilian Forest and the eyes of the gods, let us be one.”

Her words bring a smile on Cullen’s lips, and she squeals as he picks her up, carrying her to the small spot next to the lake and laying her down on the grass. She watches as he sheds his clothes, gaze traveling down his toned chest and arms to his thick, hardening shaft, blushing as a shiver of warmth travels in between her legs. She had imagined what he would look like naked on more than once occasion, but it was even better than she had expected.

Once he’s nude she follows suit, blushing even harder as Cullen watches her intently, feeling almost shy for the first time in her life.

As the clothes lie in a pile next to them, the Templar and Mage become one, with Cullen laying on top of Lydia, her legs wrapped around his waist as he slowly pushes into her warmth. His name exits her lips in a soft, breathy moan, her nipples pert and sensitive with her arousal. Once fully sheathed, the blonde begins to thrust slowly, taking in the pure beauty of his lover, lips traveling along her chest and tasting each stiff bud with slow flicks of his tongue. Lydia clings to her lover, tears of joy streaming down her cheeks as her body is filled to the brim with pleasure, her inner walls clenching around him with each thrust. His ministrations to her breasts only increase her pleasure, and she reaches her peak within moments, crying out his name in a way that breaks his heart while making him whole.

Once he rides her through her orgasm, Lydia uses her strength to flip them over, his back on the grass as she straddles him. Her eyes never leave his as she begins to slowly ride him, fingers sliding up his chest and arms and intertwining with his. The new angle allows her to truly feel every inch of his thick shaft, from the way his member pulses inside of her to the way she tightens and milks him slowly. As their gaze lingers she can see that he is feeling the same way she is; in awe of the perfection of their lovemaking, and bittersweet about their forbidden love. They have tasted the fruit, and after today, must learn to live without it.

Before he can see the tears welling in her eyes again she leans down and kisses him deeply, her hips quickening their movements as her second orgasm quickly approaches. She grips his hair as she’s again overtaken by pleasure, shuddering and gasping against his lips, her cunt milking him harder and harder as she pulses with her release.

Cullen quickly flips Lydia back over, hands gripping her hips as he fucks her in quick, deep thrusts, gasping and quickly pulling out as he finishes on her stomach, panting heavily. Lydia watches him with wide, lust-filled eyes, smiling up at him as he milks the last bit of release from his tip before collapsing next to her, chest heaving with exertion. 

After a few moments of silence Lydia slowly stands, gazing down at her sticky stomach with a small chuckle. “We still have some time… I’m going to wash up, if you don’t mind.” She gives Cullen a smile before wading into the large pond, shivering as the cold water sets in before swimming over to the waterfall, sighing in relief as the water washes over her.

A splash and a small string of expletives half-shouted behind her makes Lydia smirk, her hands working to clean off her stomach. Suddenly, two strong arms wrap around her waist from behind her, and Lydia leans back against him, closing her eyes as he begins to speak.

“I wish we could spend every day like this. I wish I didn't have this duty sometimes… I’d give it all up if it meant being with you.”

Lydia’s smile falters, her stomach churning. She turns to face him, still in his embrace.

 

“Cullen… We’re where we need to be. I wish things were different too… Maker, how I wish they were. But unfortunately, we have to live with what we’re given. I would not want you to give up the Templar way, just as I would not give up my calling as a Grey Warden. Or a mage.”

The defeat in his eyes breaks her heart, and Lydia cups his face, thumbs grazing his defined jawline. “But… We have now. And we can enjoy these last few moments together while we have them. We will both move on, but we will always have this memory as a small token of our time together.”

Instead of answering, Cullen brings her in for another kiss, the water making small ripples as they move. The kiss soon grows more passionate, hands wandering to touch every inch of the other as water pours over both of them. In a moment of heated passion, Cullen lifts Lydia and sets her on the grass next to the water, kneeling in front of her as the water surrounds his waistline. He pulls her closer by her legs, parting them to view her glistening heat before burying his face in between them.

The cries of pleasure that escape Lydia’s mouth are sure to wake the forest, but she couldn’t care even if she wanted to. The things the Templar does with his mouth and tongue are perfect, as if he’s trying to taste every inch of her. She covers her mouth as his lips find her clit, sucking gingerly as she writhes in pleasure. When she finally reaches her peak, he pushes his tongue inside of her, moaning as her release coats his tongue and mouth.

Lydia lies on the shore for a few moments, dizzy and happy, her legs shivering. Cullen washes his face off in the water before joining her, leaning down to kiss her slowly, deeply, as if trying to memorize her touch. It’s not until the kiss breaks that Lydia realizes by the light leaving the sky how late it is.

“We have to--”

“I know.”

The mage and Templar gaze at each other before standing and dressing, the silence so loud it makes Lydia shudder. The tears don’t start until she’s facing him again, both fully clothed and fully aware that this was the end for them. They share one last passionate kiss, the tears from them both mixing on their lips. It’s a kiss of beauty and sadness; of love found and lost. Of tasting the forbidden fruit and now paying the consequences.

“Lydia Amell?”

“Yes, Cullen?”

He smiles sadly, pressing one last kiss to her hand.

“I’ll see you on the other side.”


End file.
